A memory for the books

After an afternoon of sitting at my mom and stepdad's house watching the girls play, they started to get bored and glued to the TV. So I thought about how I was talking to a friend of mine the other day. She had told me about taking her daughter to the fountains to play. So I thought what a great idea and I could get some really cute pictures. 

So my mom and I packed the girls up in the car and we head down to the streets of Indian lake. The thought of a peaceful afternoon, letting the girls play in the water, sounded so lovely. Well kids are awkward,and mine are really awkward. 

First thing Kylie does is, she goes and she stands directly over the water. So Lila being a little sister copies everything that her big sister does. My children are using the water fountain as their personal bidet. It would've been perfectly fine if they were sitting on the ground on top of the water and giggling about the water coming up between your legs but no, not my children. They weren't only doing that. They were also standing straddling the water and watching the water hit them in between legs. So My mom and I sit there and watch this and giggle. I looked over at my mom and I ask,"my kids are those weird homeschool kids aren't they?" Right then Kylie comes up, "mommy I have to go potty potty potty potty." Before I could figure out a plan on where to take them to the bathroom, she just walks over to the grass and just starts peeing. And then she yells,"I Peed in the grass." Yep my kid just peed in front of everyone in public. At least she didn't pee in the fountains.

My mom and I sit there watching them as they ran around screaming and splashing. Still awkwardly sitting on the fountains. Lila tried to investigate where the water was coming from. Which ended with water shooting her in the face. Kylie is pretending to have water powers. Everything was going pretty well. 

Kylie then decides to do her "exercises" oh my lord please help me! She gets down on all fours looking up at the sky. Her version of tricep dips looks alarmingly similar to hip thrusts. Yep! My kid is now humpping the air. My mother loses it. Laughing so hard she is crying. I explain to her what she is doing and this makes my mom laugh even harder. Please keep in mind we are in the middle of an out door mall. Now Kylie turns over and starts doing push-ups, so now she is humpping the ground. I look over at my mom who is now bright red from laughing so hard. Then Lila runs over to join her sister. Both humpping the ground. Now they both attempt to do downward facing dog. Both have their butts in the air and are shaking them. They both look like they are twerking. I explain once again to my mom what they are doing and Kylie interrupts me and yells, "My Mommy Does This All The Time!" Now my mother is a very pretty shade of purple. She is laughing so hard that she can no longer breathe. 

I tell the girls to go play in the water before we have to go. I'm trying my hardest to not get on to them for being innocent. They are just trying to play and exercise, doing an awkward version, but just trying to play. I don't want to get on to them because as adults we have perverse minds. They are so innocent but so awkward! Just imagine if these where grown women out here doing the same thing. Who would have known teaching your kids exercises would turn out so embarrassing?

 

This little boy and his mom walks up and he starts doing karate chops and kicks over the water. So now Kylie wants to show off her moves. She gets down on the ground over the water that is shooting up and starts doing her push ups. She now looks like she is humpping the water. I can't take it anymore, I stand up and yell, " Kylie, for the love of god stop!" She stops and stands up,"why mommy?" "I don't know how to explain it to you, I just want you to stop!" 

I hear another mother start laughing at me. How do you explain to a child why you don't want them to shoot water up In between their legs? 

I don't think I've ever laughed so hard and been so embarrassed at the same time. A lovely day at the fountains? I think not, but most definitely a memory for the books.